When a friend broke up with her boyfriend last year there was one defining moment where she knew she’d hit rock bottom.

There she was on stage in a karaoke bar drunkenly bawling ‘Didn’t We Almost Have It All’ by Whitters to the perpetrator of her heartbreak as a gob-smacked crowd watched on in shock and awe.

After that the only way was up…

Of course when your heart has been smashed sitting round listening to moping melodies (or caterwauling them in public) seems like a perfectly reasonable idea.

But instead, for the sake of your sanity, you should allow a friend to confiscate all traces of Mariah Carey, Leona Lewis and Radiohead from your CD collection and stick these highly recommended tracks on your iPod instead…

‘Gold’ – Beverley Knight

When I asked friends to nominate their favourite, empowering, moving-on ditties for my book, I had two slightly embarrassed recommendations for this song. But you’ve gotta love a bit of Bev. In this classy ballad she tells her ex (in a rather dignified fashion) just the way it is – that’s he an ignorant fool who let a very precious entity (a.k.a. her) slip through his fingers. What a numpty.

‘I’m Outta Love’ – Anastacia

In this poignant anthem, husky diva Anastacia sums up that feeling when you’ve  done everything you can to make a relationship work but ultimately lost patience because your chap just isn’t prepared to put the work in. Through the medium of song Anastasia finally informs her man that it ain’t a one-way street. In other words, ‘Sorry, Sunny Jim, you took the piss, now I’m outta here.’ I am reliably informed this is also a great karaoke track.

‘Fighter’ – Christina Aguilera

Raising the tempo again we have that small but forceful firecracker Christina  Aguilera. With determined attitude she blares out a feisty, in-your-face message for the sadistic bully boyfriend who thought he’d broken her. ‘No,’ she exclaims. ’You’re wrong. The fact you treated me mean made me stronger and wiser.’ Yeah!

‘You Oughta Know’ – Alanis Morissette

Right, time to get angry. Ooh, can you feel the venom? This song first had me gasping in awe when, aged seventeen, I walked round college listening to Jagged Little Pill on my walkman. And fourteen years on it still has the same impact. I love the way Alanis, like a truly deranged and spurned ex-girlfriend, flits from being quiet and composed to out-of-control pure venom. You can actually picture her crazed psycho smile as she gives her philandering ex what for. Grrr.

‘Caught Out There’ – Kelis

Again, the scary wrath of a wronged woman. In this ballsy ‘don’t mess’ outpouring, Kelis dedicates her musical tale of a worthless, cheating boyfriend to all the girls out there who’ve also been lied to. She screams about how much she hates him and then warns that she’s no fool and just might take revenge.

‘Killing in the Name’ – Rage Against the Machine

Not really a break-up song but, boy, does screaming ‘motherfucker’ at the top of your voice cleanse the soul. In fact, listening to Rage Against the Machine full stop is the perfect music remedy for when someone has treated you like shit and you want to get ANGRY. Put it on your iPod and knock the crap out of a punch bag down the gym. You’ll feel so much better afterwards.

‘King of Wishful Thinking’ – Go West

Ah, calm. Now all the anger is gone, it’s time for an upbeat eighties track to set you on your way. This song is all about facing up to your heartache, pulling yourself together and being optimistic. ‘Hey, shit happens,’ Peter Cox croons on this favourite from the Pretty Woman soundtrack. ‘But that doesn’t mean I’ll always feel this way.’ And quite right he is too.

‘I don’t need a man’ – Pussy Cat Dolls

While as a general rule I am loathe to take guidance from a bunch of slutty types who think it’s acceptable to taunt men with statements like ‘don’t cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me’, on this occasion the prick-teasing harem have got it right. An upbeat anthem about being self-sufficient and not needing a man to be happy. Bravo.

‘Single Ladies (Put a ring on it)’ – Beyoncé

A triumphant ‘up yours’ to the commitment phobe who refused to propose but now is green with jealousy that his former squeeze has moved on. The upbeat ‘ho-ho-ho’s’ really make this song and always give me a vision of sexy semi-clad ladies flexing their bare ring fingers in the faces of marriage-shirking exes – all the while pulling off some great Beyoncé booty moves. ‘Uh-huh, you had it, but you lost it.’

‘Wild Women Do’ – Natalie Cole

Let’s finish with another eighties classic from the Pretty Woman soundtrack - arguably THE must-have album for any lady. This ballsy refrain is all about getting out there and enjoying yourself with hedonistic glory. ‘Guess what, you don’t have to conform or take second best,’ Natalie says. ‘It’s actually all about YOU.’ Hurrah – three cheers for Nats! A perfect ending to an empowering playlist.

Best of all you can listen to it here:

Music to bid boys goodbye

So what’s your favourite break-up song?